


witches don't need vitamins

by supermanandjokbal



Category: Hinatazaka46 (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, F/F, don't do what shiho does
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-06
Updated: 2020-09-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:27:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26321149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supermanandjokbal/pseuds/supermanandjokbal
Summary: in which shiho makes very questionable choices with a love potion.or the hogwarts au no one asked for.
Relationships: Katou Shiho/Sasaki Kumi, implied Saito Kyoko/Takamoto Ayaka
Comments: 3
Kudos: 18





	witches don't need vitamins

**Author's Note:**

  * For [aberfaeth](https://archiveofourown.org/users/aberfaeth/gifts).



"hey!" shiho feels a strong tap on her shoulder. eyebrow raised, she turns around to see her best friend and 'other half', saito kyoko. 

"what's up?" she asks, eyes following kyoko as she takes a seat opposite her. 

it's break time and they're in the great hall. really, it used to be odd to see people from different houses sit together, but after the fiasco with the boy who lived, it didn't really matter much anymore. 

"so i've heard," kyoko beckons shiho to lean closer to listen. 

"yes?" 

"there's a love potion black market," kyoko says in a low voice, looking around to make sure no one else heard. 

"and?" shiho cocks an eyebrow, "hey don't tell me you're gonna get it! i'll tell ayaka i swear!" 

kyoko quickly waves her hands in front of her face in denial, "no that's not what i- ayaka was the one who told me! told me 'don't you dare drink any water from this bottle if anyone gives you it', or something." 

"oh, that's it? boring," shiho leans back, "what does this have to do with me anyway?" 

"this has to do with you because of that," kyoko says, looking at something. 

shiho follows her gaze to see sasaki kumi, current gryffindor quidditch team captain and maybe the love of her life. 

it's not like they were childhood friends and knew each other for a long time or anything, no. they met in their first year, when shiho quite embarrassingly fell off her broom. 

but this tall and gorgeous girl, who somehow noticed her fall from at least 30 meters above her, flew down to check on her. 

still hovering on her broom, she asked shiho if she was fine. shiho might've broken a bone or two, but being carried to the infirmary by sasaki kumi was more than enough compensation.

kumi somehow stayed in the infirmary for 3 hours with a stranger (and a slytherin at that). ever since then they became friends, meeting in the great hall almost every day. 

not that they meet all that much anymore, since kumi is always so busy being quidditch captain, and also because kumi is always surrounded with other gryffindor kids. 

which is unfortunate for shiho, because somewhere along the sneaking out of the dungeons to hang out with kumi, she fell in love with the captain.

though really, who wouldn't? kumi is perfect. even though kumi had quidditch training and prefect duties almost everyday, she never missed a single thursday meeting. 

shiho hates it, because how can a girl look so good, be so talented and be nice??? that's just unfair. 

shiho gets snapped out of her trance when she hears her name being called. 

"toshi-chan?" 

okay, maybe not exactly her name, but the super amazingly cute nickname kumi came up with. 

(miles better than the burikko 'shihorin' she used to call herself)

"oh, yeah, sorry, I was uh," shiho tries to think of a cool excuse. maybe kumi will stop thinking of her as an airhead and more as a potential love interest. 

"daydreaming?" kumi giggles, much to shiho's chagrin. 

"the usual shiho," kyoko adds on. 

shiho huffs, "aw come on!" 

kumi pats shiho on the head, "nothing wrong with that, plus you look adorable." 

shiho can't even be mad for a second because sasaki kumi was just too bloody lovable. 

-

ayaka comes and drags kyoko off somewhere mid-conversation, leaving only kumi and shiho on the table. 

"how's quidditch training?" shiho asks, resting her head on her arm. 

"alright," kumi pauses, "well, for me. the new kids probably hate me," she laughs. 

"i genuinely don't think you can be hated," shiho mentions, lazily playing with the book in front of her with her other hand, "you're like, the perfect girl." 

"are you hitting on me?" kumi jokes. 

"oh shut up," shiho rolls her eyes, hoping to every god that she isn't blushing. 

kumi laughs, grabbing the book shiho was playing with. "ancient runes made easy? you're planning to take ancient runes?" 

"i don't know," shiho heaves a sigh, "miho's taking it next year and it certainly seems more fun than divination." 

kumi nods in agreement, "initially i was thinking of taking muggle studies, but i'm probably gonna be bored to tears hearing them talk about things we already know." 

both kumi and shiho were muggle born, so they naturally know almost everything there is to know about the muggle world.

"40 reasons why muggles invented electricity," shiho mocks, "cellphones, it's 100% for cellphones." 

kumi giggles, "don't forget computers and games..." she pauses for a while, then says under her breath, "and to watch glee."

"yeah, trust me, i'll always remember you stealing my hulu account just to watch it in year 1," shiho teases. 

"in my defense, it's a great show." 

"yeah, yeah, it's amazing," shiho replies, having watched exactly one episode. 

she knows she's in love with kumi because even though she ignores everything shiho says the moment she hears the glee theme, shiho only thinks of how cute she looks. 

"is there something on my face?" shiho hears kumi ask, then realises she's been staring at her face. 

"yeah, your ridiculous love for glee." 

"shut up." 

their conversation is cut short when a cute girl with the brightest smile wearing gryffindor robes approaches them. 

"oh, kono-chan," kumi stands up, "sorry, toshi-chan, i gotta go now," she waves to shiho and leaves the table. 

shiho thinks of that famous muggle saying, "hate to see you go, but love to watch you leave." 

-

shiho doesn't want to resort to a bloody love potion, but she's been seeing kumi hang out with that cute junior from before a lot.  
really, she doesn't have the right to be jealous. they're not even dating. 

apparently her subconscious thinks otherwise, because before she even realises, she's off to ask kyoko about the black market love potion-laced water. 

"you're seriously going for it, huh?" kyoko asks, teasingly.

"don't make fun of me, i thought a lot about this," shiho replies. 

"didn't kyoko tell you about this yesterday?" ayaka stifles a laugh, barely looking up from . 

"oh, shut up," shiho retorts, "so, where do i get it? do i talk to someone or?" 

ayaka lowers her voice, "i don't know the details myself but from what i've heard, everything goes down in girls lavatory on the third floor in the central tower. at 4pm, silence yourself and slip a galleon under stall 3 and they'll slip you the potion." 

shiho raises her eyebrow, "wow. doesn't sound a tad bit sketchy at all," she sarcastically says, "but okay, fine, i'll risk losing a galleon to have kumi love me for a day." 

"that's the spirit!" kyoko cheers and gives shiho a hard pat on the back, "go get your girl!" 

"for one day, kyoko. one," shiho deadpans, then walks away from the couple to her next class. 

"if you ask me, it's worth it!" shiho hears kyoko shout from behind her.

what she doesn't hear is ayaka asking kyoko "how does she not realise that all she needs is courage and not a love potion?" 

\- 

she can't believe she's actually doing this. why in the hell was she doing this? 

was she really about to buy a super sketchy, possibly poisonous love potion to get kumi to love her? was she really going to risk their friendship (and kumi's health, if it _is_ poisonous) to get her undivided attention for one day? 

if her walking out of the lavatory with a bottle of the love potion a few hours later is anything to go by, the answer is a loud, resounding yes. 

honestly, she was surprised it wasn't a scam. a 100% anonymous drug exchange just sounded like the breeding grounds for fraud.

drug. god, she was going to bloody drug her best friend. 

this is so so so wrong, but shiho now has one galleon less in her pockets and there won't be long-term negative effects. 

'except maybe to my friendship with kumi, and my heart, and my mental health,' shiho thinks to herself. but hey, no long-term damage to kumi, so everything is well. 

plus it's not like their friendship will 100% be wrecked by shiho admitting to being in love with kumi... right?

if push comes to shove, she'll just say it was misplaced and she was trying to give it to someone else. yeah, so maybe kumi might lose all respect for shiho's morals, but at least she won't feel like she has to act any different in front of her. 

the more shiho thinks about it, the more acceptable it sounds. 

(shut up mom it's not drugging, it's just me strongly convincing kumi to love me back for one day) 

\- 

the plan was simple. mix that love potion with kumi's favourite vitamin C drink and give it to her before her quidditch practice. 

it's foolproof. and kumi would also probably love her for just giving her the drink. 

so she mixes the drinks discreetly in some bathroom stall, to avoid anyone else from catching her in the act. she also bottles the drink so no one can tell from the scent that it's laced with love potion. 

all that's left to do is to wait till kumi's practice starts and then tomorrow shiho will be the most loved-by-kumi person in the world. 

after the hours pass, shiho heads straight to the quidditch pitch for the handover. 

she sees the cute junior first, who waves at her really happily. she's cute AND nice? god damn it. 

"hello! you're.. shiho-san right?" the girl sees shiho's puzzled look and then chuckles, "i heard about you from captain! are you looking for her?" 

huh. kumi talks about her? shiho is praying that it's in the "she's a really cool person and i love her" kinda way and not the "i hate having to pretend to like her as a friend" kinda way. 

"yeah, i am. you're, uh.. kono-san?" shiho pretends to be unsure. 

in reality, she knows matsuda konoka's full name. maybe she did a little bit of stalking on hogwarts' social network to see who her potential enemies could be. 

"yeah!" the girl, as usual, has the brightest, most blinding smile in the world, "captain should be over there," she nods to a direction, "it's nice to meet you!" 

"great to meet you too," shiho replies, internally thinking 'god she's so bright and her smile is like the prettiest in the world, i could never compete with her'. 

but when she sees the smile that kumi has when their eyes meet, she takes back her words because kumi definitely has the prettiest smile in the universe. 

"hey, what're you doing here?" kumi says as she walks towards her, "and are my eyes deceiving me or is that lypo-c?" 

"here to boost my best friend's mood?" shiho offers, "and yes, it is. had my mom send it through owl post."

kumi squints her eyes, "the last time you came to visit me at the pitch was to look at a hot senior in year 1, so which junior is it you're here for?"

kumi was so wrong about that. shiho _did_ go to the pitch under the pretense of looking at a hot senior (well, she was) but it was mostly just to stare at how good kumi looked in her quidditch uniform. 

"is it so hard to believe that i'm here just for you to get a boost since you've been tired and busy?" shiho tilts her head. 

is shiho hallucinating or is there a faint shade of red on kumi's cheeks?

"you win this time," kumi humphs, then laughs, "jokes aside, if you continue doing things like that i just might need to marry you." 

now, shiho would usually panic and blush at this point, but the confidence of kumi definitely loving her the next day does something to her. 

"maybe i _should_ do this more," shiho replies cheekily, hoping to make kumi feel something, "then you'll have no choice but to be my wife." 

"i'll take you up on that offer," kumi winks and grabs the bottle of lypo-c, "seriously, thank you for this, i missed this soooo much." 

thankfully for shiho, someone calls out kumi's name before she can become a gay mess and kumi waves a bye to her, leaving shiho still in a trance.

kumi is so bloody unfair, shiho thinks. she's probably joking but that sentence?? that made her feel something. and it sucks that shiho might potentially ruin this. 

but it's not like she can tell kumi "hey, actually, don't drink that, i laced it with love potion," right now. so she just prays that kumi is an angel (she is) and forgives her for her sins after it's all over. 

-

shiho doesn't quite sleep that night, and ends up at the great hall earlier than usual. but weirdly enough, kumi was already there when she enters.

it's weird because kumi usually doesn't have time to meet her and kyonaya on wednesday mornings.

at first shiho thinks, it worked, kumi couldn't wait to see me, and expected to hear some gross, sweet words from her.

but her first words were, verbatim, "what the hell kind of witchcraft did you do to my sweet junior?" 

firstly, kumi doesn't curse. "hell" is considered bad by her standards. 

secondly, kumi does not look one bit in love with her. 

kumi continues at shiho's puzzled face, "kono-chan was speaking non-stop about how gorgeous you are and how in love she is with you. she met you yesterday."

"i.. leave a very strong impression?" shiho sheepishly says.

kumi gives her the i-know-what-you-did stare and shiho crumbles under it, "seriously, i didn't do anything to her!" 

well, not intentionally to her, but obviously something went wrong. shiho doesn't know how the hell it did, but it did. and it was hella wrong. 

for whatever reason, it turned out that kumi's cute junior - konoka, ended up drinking the lypo-c. 

(shiho is lowkey offended at the notion that kumi would give her little perk-me-up to someone else after saying all those things) 

and what's worse is that kumi isn't under the effects. at all. 

if it still got kumi to love her, shiho really didn't mind. she gets loved by the love of her life and someone else. doesn't seem bad. 

but this? the worst possible situation. how has god forsaken her like that? 

"shiho, you're gorgeous and amazing and i love you, but that is not something that happens overnight. now, what did you actually do?" 

and shiho knows that kumi didn't mean the l-word like that, but experiencing the shock from her failure, she really had to ask. 

"did you just say the l word to me?" 

it was just wasted breath, because kumi just gives her the Disapproving Mother Look and shiho resigns to it. 

"okay fine, so maybe i, kinda, might've, perhaps, at some point-"

"OUT with it."

"i mixed a love potion into the bottle of lypo-c i gave you yesterday," shiho says, voice going up towards the end of the sentence. 

if kumi realises the implications of that, she doesn't show it. 

instead she just nods, "okay. that makes perfect sense and i'm bringing konoka to professor slughorn right now," she starts walking away.

"wait, i-" 

"we'll have a conversation on spiking drinks later, shiho," she turns back and says curtly. 

yeah, shiho is probably in a WHOLE lot of trouble, kumi also did say they were going to talk later. which means their friendship isn't broken! at least not yet. 

-

kyoko and ayaka thoroughly make fun of shiho for messing up. but honestly, who would've predicted that the drink would somehow be given to someone else??? 

but aside from all the teasing, they also offer somewhat practical advice. 

(though shiho didn't really believe it at first)

imagine. those two? practical advice??? ayaka can't go to the bathroom without someone accompanying her and kyoko still occasionally causes explosions with her spells.

but the more she thought about it, the more it made sense. 

since she's already caused quite the fuss and kumi has probably already figured out what happened, she'll just come clean and confess if she gets confronted. 

kyonaya also convince her that kumi is the greatest woman alive and wouldn't break a friendship just because someone caught feelings for her.

which really, why the heck did they not tell her that before she made a clown of herself? 

-

shiho tries to delay the confession (and the 10% possibility of their friendship breaking) by hiding in the library. because no one would expect her to be there. 

shiho parks herself at the corner with a book that she had no interest in. she was just going to wait it out till kumi started quidditch practice, then she was going to hurry back to the dungeons. 

but again, the (wo)man up there just absolutely loves playing with her. 

because she hears a sound and instinctively looks up, only to see sasaki kumi, staring at her. 

"i knew you were gonna hide from me," kumi whispers - they're still in a library after all, "so i found you."

shut up kumi, stop making things sound so goddamn romantic, shiho thinks. maybe she's watched too many romcoms. 

"congrats," shiho tries to make her voice playful, "do you want a prize?" 

"yeah, let's get out of the library and talk," kumi says seriously. 

god damn it. it backfired. 

so now, shiho is at the three broomsticks with a cup of butterbeer in her hands and an expressionless sasaki kumi opposite her. 

"so..." shiho starts, "look, i'm sorry, drugging anyone with anything is morally wrong and stupid and i'm dumb. like, you know i'm dumb. i barely passed every subject last year-"

"relax, shiho, i'm not gonna hex you or anything," kumi takes a sip of her butterbeer, "just. i dunno. why in the world would you think of using a love potion for anything? i didn't even think you could brew any?"

"okay, firstly, rude, i bought it but i probably could if i tried," shiho rebuts, "and like i said, i'm stupid and when stupid people get desperate, they do stupid things." 

"like letting your best friend drink love potion-laced vitamin C?" kumi raises her eyebrows, "you _do_ know love potions only cause really intense infatuation and not true love, right?" 

"i'm stupid but not that stupid," shiho mumbles and takes a huge gulp of butterbeer, "and yes, i knooow, it was dumb and stupid and i'm stupid and don't deserve your friendship anymore." 

"i never said that." 

"oh. so we're still friends?" shiho asks, while also noticing that kumi actually hasn't brought up anything about shiho liking her. 

"of course we're still friends, you dummy. though i may not accept drinks from you for the next year," kumi jokes, putting down her entire glass of butterbeer after finishing it. 

shiho heaves a sigh and finishes her own drink, "thank god. i thought i was going to have to go through ancient runes without a sasaki kumi." 

they leave the pub and still no talk about shiho's feelings. which makes shiho kind of sad because even though there's no way hogwart's most perfect girl would like her back, she still held on to the 1% hope. 

so she musters the courage to ask kumi while they're walking back to the school. 

"hey, did you not drink the lypo-c at all?" she asks meekly. 

"what do you mean? you gave it to me," she chuckles, "i actually drank most of it. i just let kono-chan take a few sips to let her taste it," kumi tilts her head to the side. 

"wait, then how the hell did _you_ not get affected?" shiho stops in her tracks and furrows her eyebrows, thinking that maybe the love potion was a some delayed-effect scam after all. 

"i thought you knew it would only cause infatuation?" kumi raises her eyebrows at shiho, stopping alongside her. 

"yeah but, what does this have to do with anything??" shiho only gets more perplexed. did kumi lose her mind from shiho's antics? 

"you can't really be infatuated with someone you're in love with right?" kumi casually says, then continues walking. 

shiho instinctively replies, "oh, yeah, makes sense" even though her mind was still processing kumi's words. 

"WAIT A MINUTE," she runs after kumi, who has the goofiest grin on her face. 

**Author's Note:**

> disclaimer: don't drug anyone ever bc it's a really bad and horrible thing to do no matter how desperate you are ok thanks


End file.
